Energy lost, nowhere to hide
Melancholy feelings remain inside
Commitments yet to be fulfilled
Good habits and faith I must build
By God's grace alone I continue on
Fortitude in me, completely gone
Leaning on my Savior to pull me through
Without His love, I'd know not what to do
This struggle, insignificant, it may not be
My faith foundation growing significantly
With my Lord, I'll continue to grow
No more "thinking" He's with me, for I'll "know"
Friday, March 20, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Praise
Arms elevated toward the sun
Praising my Father, the Holy one
My creator, my savior, my guide
The One that never leaves my side
Perplexed how You can be
My father, my brother, a friend to me
Yet, here and now, I know it's true
Turning my lowly heart anew
I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide
Down on my knees, calling out strong
Praise You are given, You've deserved all along
Radiant beams gleam from my soul
Becoming like Jesus, my new life goal
Singing, dancing, giving You all
Knowing without You, I'd surely fall
Living a life to bring You all glory
Understanding I'm sinful and You are All Holy
I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide
My sin is now gone, and You remain
Seeing my soul, clear as the rain
No longer dirty and filled with mud
Jesus has saved me with His love
Jesus, my Savior, died on the cross
No more tears shed for He has walked
He rose and strode away from the tomb
Now waiting in heaven with an open room
I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Irrational
The intensity of the anger, the pain
When you know that all is well
Causes something more than confusion
Trapped in a daily hell
Feelings grounded in absolutely nothing
Irrational anger, irrational fear
How did you become this person
Losing oneself with every tear
So hot, so cold, so light, so dark
Wrapped up into one full day
All is grand, All is hopeless
With nothing left to say
Words tell lies, Feelings deceive
Now nothing left to do
Who has the answer to who you are
Not a soul knows, not even you
When you know that all is well
Causes something more than confusion
Trapped in a daily hell
Feelings grounded in absolutely nothing
Irrational anger, irrational fear
How did you become this person
Losing oneself with every tear
So hot, so cold, so light, so dark
Wrapped up into one full day
All is grand, All is hopeless
With nothing left to say
Words tell lies, Feelings deceive
Now nothing left to do
Who has the answer to who you are
Not a soul knows, not even you
Partner
Struggle in spirit, body and mind
Brings you to one place
A place where peace can be found
Once you accept His grace
Daily walk through pain and strife
Beginning to look around
Seeing alone you really aren't
The Lord is to be found
His cross so heavy, He picked it up
Shed blood, cried out for all
The cross you bear is a true burden
But, He's there in case you fall
Compare the walks side by side
You'll see that you are blessed
For alone He walked to carry his cross
But, He's there when you call for rest
Don't forget the Love you have
The power of the Lord
The shoulder to cry upon when you're down
And calling to be cured
Brings you to one place
A place where peace can be found
Once you accept His grace
Daily walk through pain and strife
Beginning to look around
Seeing alone you really aren't
The Lord is to be found
His cross so heavy, He picked it up
Shed blood, cried out for all
The cross you bear is a true burden
But, He's there in case you fall
Compare the walks side by side
You'll see that you are blessed
For alone He walked to carry his cross
But, He's there when you call for rest
Don't forget the Love you have
The power of the Lord
The shoulder to cry upon when you're down
And calling to be cured
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Reliance
Today the Lord has placed on my heart
A new incentive, a way to re-start
He asked me to look inside my soul
To question my motives, my end goal
Looking deep within and looking out
I found that I have lived, not devout
As I had thought that I had lived
But, only for me did I seem to give
My goals I claimed to send His way
Were to make me happy at the end of the day
Decent goals set for good end results
For the wrong reasons, the outcome is naught
So, I asked Him to set my soul straight
Send me truth as it's still not too late
He sent me burning love, a faith on fire
Flames ablaze, veritable desire
The needs are still there, the goals the same
The difference relying in the recipient's name
For the Lord deserves my loving worship, my soul
He will never forsake me as we walk toward our goal
A new incentive, a way to re-start
He asked me to look inside my soul
To question my motives, my end goal
Looking deep within and looking out
I found that I have lived, not devout
As I had thought that I had lived
But, only for me did I seem to give
My goals I claimed to send His way
Were to make me happy at the end of the day
Decent goals set for good end results
For the wrong reasons, the outcome is naught
So, I asked Him to set my soul straight
Send me truth as it's still not too late
He sent me burning love, a faith on fire
Flames ablaze, veritable desire
The needs are still there, the goals the same
The difference relying in the recipient's name
For the Lord deserves my loving worship, my soul
He will never forsake me as we walk toward our goal
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Simple
Stranger to myself, I have become
Complete total eclipse of the sun
Darkness fills the emptiness
Since being told there's nothing left
No answers that they see for my mind
Calmness, serenity has gone blind
Experts lost at words and advice
Giving up on any successful life
Turn to the Lord for humans fail
Pray He lifts me from my earthly hell
Ready not for heaven, I understand
So desire on earth a nurturing Hand
One so big, so firm, so full
Security which grows not dull
Love so deep, I forget to ask
Why I've obscured behind this mask
What keeps me from letting go
From true trust and not a show
From handing all to Him today
Whether forlorn, furious or gay
The answer so simple and right there
But yet I accuse Him that He must not care
Answer so simple I fail to see
I'm unable to bow down and let it be
Current prayer for strength to know
How to just let it all go
With my Lord, I wish to walk
Quietly hearkening as He talks
His answers, advice I strive to know
It's my reservations that keep it from so
Lord, take me now, my faith so small
Shower me with love, growing my faith tall
Complete total eclipse of the sun
Darkness fills the emptiness
Since being told there's nothing left
No answers that they see for my mind
Calmness, serenity has gone blind
Experts lost at words and advice
Giving up on any successful life
Turn to the Lord for humans fail
Pray He lifts me from my earthly hell
Ready not for heaven, I understand
So desire on earth a nurturing Hand
One so big, so firm, so full
Security which grows not dull
Love so deep, I forget to ask
Why I've obscured behind this mask
What keeps me from letting go
From true trust and not a show
From handing all to Him today
Whether forlorn, furious or gay
The answer so simple and right there
But yet I accuse Him that He must not care
Answer so simple I fail to see
I'm unable to bow down and let it be
Current prayer for strength to know
How to just let it all go
With my Lord, I wish to walk
Quietly hearkening as He talks
His answers, advice I strive to know
It's my reservations that keep it from so
Lord, take me now, my faith so small
Shower me with love, growing my faith tall
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Glory
Waking this morning to glorify You
In my thoughts, my words and all that I do
It's through my Savior Jesus Christ
In which I should establish my life
Gratitude given for my salvation
The love you send never on vacation
So, in my failings and in my pride
You never forsake me, staying at my side
Request today, you rid me of evil
My self indulgence, self delight kill
Assist me in You, Lord, to place my praise
Living entirely for You all of my days
In my thoughts, my words and all that I do
It's through my Savior Jesus Christ
In which I should establish my life
Gratitude given for my salvation
The love you send never on vacation
So, in my failings and in my pride
You never forsake me, staying at my side
Request today, you rid me of evil
My self indulgence, self delight kill
Assist me in You, Lord, to place my praise
Living entirely for You all of my days
Friday, March 6, 2009
Tethered
Afraid of heights, but told
Bungee jumping is the cure
Go on up and let loose
Overcome fear and soar
So up you go, attached you are
To the seemingly unsteady tether
Trusting yourself to those who say
This battle you can weather
You do this once, you do it twice
Two years later, you find
That the risk you take each time you try
Is not curing your mind
It's adding stress you'd like to avoid
Each time it's from new heights
And so you consider cutting the cord
Since the cure is not in flight
Bungee jumping is the cure
Go on up and let loose
Overcome fear and soar
So up you go, attached you are
To the seemingly unsteady tether
Trusting yourself to those who say
This battle you can weather
You do this once, you do it twice
Two years later, you find
That the risk you take each time you try
Is not curing your mind
It's adding stress you'd like to avoid
Each time it's from new heights
And so you consider cutting the cord
Since the cure is not in flight
Merriment
Emptiness filled with laughter
Despair filled with joy
Desiring the feeling stay
Like a child with a new toy
Doesn't matter why
Only that it is
How the day began
Anguish not missed
Judgment the only hurdle
The looks from those who know
The obstacle to overcome
Tears never failing to show
Pray, hope, this time
Critics are misled
Merriment sticks around
Ridding me of dread
Despair filled with joy
Desiring the feeling stay
Like a child with a new toy
Doesn't matter why
Only that it is
How the day began
Anguish not missed
Judgment the only hurdle
The looks from those who know
The obstacle to overcome
Tears never failing to show
Pray, hope, this time
Critics are misled
Merriment sticks around
Ridding me of dread
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Duel
Tornado flies through the town
Destroying houses, nature, lives
Oddness, however, is found
When the neighbor's house is fine
But, yet to crumbles your house is
With nothing left to see
And thankful for the neighbor's miss
You nevertheless wonder, "why me"
Look around your lowly street
Some buildings still intact
Others a more destructive meet
The twister had on impact
Without the shelter to protect
You wonder how you'll live
Can your life be like the sect
Which still has much to give
Strength is required to decide
How to re-build your dwelling
Especially when you abide
Where twisters are overflowing
Left to ponder all alone
If asked to fight with power
Another destructive cyclone
You'll be able not to cower
Destroying houses, nature, lives
Oddness, however, is found
When the neighbor's house is fine
But, yet to crumbles your house is
With nothing left to see
And thankful for the neighbor's miss
You nevertheless wonder, "why me"
Look around your lowly street
Some buildings still intact
Others a more destructive meet
The twister had on impact
Without the shelter to protect
You wonder how you'll live
Can your life be like the sect
Which still has much to give
Strength is required to decide
How to re-build your dwelling
Especially when you abide
Where twisters are overflowing
Left to ponder all alone
If asked to fight with power
Another destructive cyclone
You'll be able not to cower
Chris Tomlin song...
Ok, Chris Tomlin is one of my favorite music artists. His songs are real and inspiring. My original intention was to only post my own work here;but, I decided if there were anyone out there actually reading this to be inspired(and not just to understand me better) than this was worth posting. I could never do it justice...so, here it is...
"How Can I Keep From Singing" by Chris Tomlin
There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring
And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling
How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing
I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives
And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give
I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne
"How Can I Keep From Singing" by Chris Tomlin
There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring
And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling
How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing
I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives
And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give
I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne
Monday, March 2, 2009
Identity
Who am I, a brilliant question
Answer lost to those that are tied
To mental illness, confusion inside
For one moment, it all seems right
And the next, seemingly wrong
Never sure which will last long
It might be neither, or maybe both
Inside, never sure of the fact
Leaving an identity no longer intact
Only one place to go when I'm lost
To the Lord with trust that He can see
The truth of what's inside of me
Even if I no longer know
Who I am, who I'm not
Must obey the lessons taught
And place my trust in my creator
My Father, brother, friend
Bracing for mood swings once again
Answer lost to those that are tied
To mental illness, confusion inside
For one moment, it all seems right
And the next, seemingly wrong
Never sure which will last long
It might be neither, or maybe both
Inside, never sure of the fact
Leaving an identity no longer intact
Only one place to go when I'm lost
To the Lord with trust that He can see
The truth of what's inside of me
Even if I no longer know
Who I am, who I'm not
Must obey the lessons taught
And place my trust in my creator
My Father, brother, friend
Bracing for mood swings once again
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