Friday, March 20, 2009


Energy lost, nowhere to hide
Melancholy feelings remain inside
Commitments yet to be fulfilled
Good habits and faith I must build

By God's grace alone I continue on
Fortitude in me, completely gone
Leaning on my Savior to pull me through
Without His love, I'd know not what to do

This struggle, insignificant, it may not be
My faith foundation growing significantly
With my Lord, I'll continue to grow
No more "thinking" He's with me, for I'll "know"

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


Arms elevated toward the sun
Praising my Father, the Holy one
My creator, my savior, my guide
The One that never leaves my side

Perplexed how You can be
My father, my brother, a friend to me
Yet, here and now, I know it's true
Turning my lowly heart anew

I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide

Down on my knees, calling out strong
Praise You are given, You've deserved all along
Radiant beams gleam from my soul
Becoming like Jesus, my new life goal

Singing, dancing, giving You all
Knowing without You, I'd surely fall
Living a life to bring You all glory
Understanding I'm sinful and You are All Holy

I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide

My sin is now gone, and You remain
Seeing my soul, clear as the rain
No longer dirty and filled with mud
Jesus has saved me with His love

Jesus, my Savior, died on the cross
No more tears shed for He has walked
He rose and walked away from the tomb
Now waiting in heaven with an open room

I will unlock my heart and open it wide
I will give my decisions for You to decide
I will worship You in truth and in love
I will tell the world the Son's raised above
I will love You, trust You, walk by Your side
I will know in my heart, with me, You abide

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


The intensity of the anger, the pain
When you know that all is well
Causes something more than confusion
Trapped in a daily hell

Feelings grounded in absolutely nothing
Irrational anger, irrational fear
How did you become this person
Losing oneself with every tear

So hot, so cold, so light, so dark
Wrapped up into one full day
All is grand, All is hopeless
With nothing left to say

Words tell lies, Feelings deceive
Now nothing left to do
Who has the answer to who you are
Not a soul knows, not even you


Struggle in spirit, body and mind
Brings you to one place
A place where peace can be found
Once you accept His grace

Daily walk through pain and strife
Beginning to look around
Seeing alone you really aren't
The Lord is to be found

His cross so heavy, He picked it up
Shed blood, cried out for all
The cross you bear is a true burden
But, He's there in case you fall

Compare the walks side by side
You'll see that you are blessed
For alone He walked to carry his cross
But, He's there when you call for rest

Don't forget the Love you have
The power of the Lord
The shoulder to cry upon when you're down
And calling to be cured

Sunday, March 15, 2009


Today the Lord has placed on my heart
A new incentive, a way to re-start
He asked me to look inside my soul
To question my motives, my end goal

Looking deep within and looking out
I found that I have lived, not devout
As I had thought that I had lived
But, only for me did I seem to give

My goals I claimed to send His way
Were to make me happy at the end of the day
Decent goals set for good end results
For the wrong reasons, the outcome is naught

So, I asked Him to set my soul straight
Send me truth as it's still not too late
He sent me burning love, a faith on fire
Flames ablaze, veritable desire

The needs are still there, the goals the same
The difference relying in the recipient's name
For the Lord deserves my loving worship, my soul
He will never forsake me as we walk toward our goal

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


Stranger to myself, I have become
Complete total eclipse of the sun
Darkness fills the emptiness
Since being told there's nothing left

No answers that they see for my mind
Calmness, serenity has gone blind
Experts lost at words and advice
Giving up on any successful life

Turn to the Lord for humans fail
Pray He lifts me from my earthly hell
Ready not for heaven, I understand
So desire on earth a nurturing Hand

One so big, so firm, so full
Security which grows not dull
Love so deep, I forget to ask
Why I've obscured behind this mask

What keeps me from letting go
From true trust and not a show
From handing all to Him today
Whether forlorn, furious or gay

The answer so simple and right there
But yet I accuse Him that He must not care
Answer so simple I fail to see
I'm unable to bow down and let it be

Current prayer for strength to know
How to just let it all go
With my Lord, I wish to walk
Quietly hearkening as He talks

His answers, advice I strive to know
It's my reservations that keep it from so
Lord, take me now, my faith so small
Shower me with love, growing my faith tall

Sunday, March 8, 2009


Waking this morning to glorify You
In my thoughts, my words and all that I do
It's through my Savior Jesus Christ
In which I should establish my life

Gratitude given for my salvation
The love you send never on vacation
So, in my failings and in my pride
You never forsake me, staying at my side

Request today, you rid me of evil
My self indulgence, self delight kill
Assist me in You, Lord, to place my praise
Living entirely for You all of my days

Friday, March 6, 2009


Afraid of heights, but told
Bungee jumping is the cure
Go on up and let loose
Overcome fear and soar

So up you go, attached you are
To the seemingly unsteady tether
Trusting yourself to those who say
This battle you can weather

You do this once, you do it twice
Two years later, you find
That the risk you take each time you try
Is not curing your mind

It's adding stress you'd like to avoid
Each time it's from new heights
And so you consider cutting the cord
Since the cure is not in flight


Emptiness filled with laughter
Despair filled with joy
Desiring the feeling stay
Like a child with a new toy

Doesn't matter why
Only that it is
How the day began
Anguish not missed

Judgment the only hurdle
The looks from those who know
The obstacle to overcome
Tears never failing to show

Pray, hope, this time
Critics are misled
Merriment sticks around
Ridding me of dread

Tuesday, March 3, 2009


Tornado flies through the town
Destroying houses, nature, lives
Oddness, however, is found
When the neighbor's house is fine

But, yet to crumbles your house is
With nothing left to see
And thankful for the neighbor's miss
You nevertheless wonder, "why me"

Look around your lowly street
Some buildings still intact
Others a more destructive meet
The twister had on impact

Without the shelter to protect
You wonder how you'll live
Can your life be like the sect
Which still has much to give

Strength is required to decide
How to re-build your dwelling
Especially when you abide
Where twisters are overflowing

Left to ponder all alone
If asked to fight with power
Another destructive cyclone
You'll be able not to cower

Chris Tomlin song...

Ok, Chris Tomlin is one of my favorite music artists. His songs are real and inspiring. My original intention was to only post my own work here;but, I decided if there were anyone out there actually reading this to be inspired(and not just to understand me better) than this was worth posting. I could never do it, here it is...

"How Can I Keep From Singing" by Chris Tomlin

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

Monday, March 2, 2009


Who am I, a brilliant question
Answer lost to those that are tied
To mental illness, confusion inside

For one moment, it all seems right
And the next, seemingly wrong
Never sure which will last long

It might be neither, or maybe both
Inside, never sure of the fact
Leaving an identity no longer intact

Only one place to go when I'm lost
To the Lord with trust that He can see
The truth of what's inside of me

Even if I no longer know
Who I am, who I'm not
Must obey the lessons taught

And place my trust in my creator
My Father, brother, friend
Bracing for mood swings once again